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Friday 12 February 2016

#IAmCapable - A change in society

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I would say that 90% men think the same. I have personally met boys in my college, work place and in my building and locality who mainly judge girls based on their looks. I've seen them laughing at girls who are over weight and passing taunts at them when the enter and leave our building and even married men who aren't happy because they wife is either over weight or less beautiful compared to the neighbors or other working women in their offices, they start getting more friendly with other girls. It's a sad fact but it does happen that men base their judgement on the looks only of a women.


I had applied on a marriage portal for a groom and I got a response mainly based on my looks and not my education. The responses were like "You look so pretty with long hair. Why is your hair cut in the other one?" "Is this your real photograph? Why don't you do your eyebrows?" and so on and I thought they truly liked me profile and hence contacted me. On further talking to these boys, they made remarks about my weight issues which was embarrassing as I never contacted them based on their looks but rather checked their profile to see if we could match or not.


There were other responses as well where the boy's parents used to comment that we want a fair-skinned girl who has a height of 5' 6'' or 5' 7'' and only prefers wearing a sari as their son wants the girl to have those qualities. They asked me for the photograph where I had worn a sari. They never cared about knowing the real inner qualities of the girl.


b. 64% of women agree that the judgments passed on them have affected their ability to reach their true potential.

I have not been a person to consider the comments more important than my goal and hence I've always ignored all these judgement and only focused on my goal. However, there have been women in India who were forced to marry without their wish and opinion as their family felt that they would not get a decent groom due to their daughter's looks while there have been cases where women have been put down due to their color, especially in the Bollywood world where girls who are dark skinned and don't look pretty have not been chosen for movies.


c. 70%of women agree that majority of judgments on women are from family members or friends rather than strangers.

That's true. I have also heard remarks made by my cousins about my weight and they begin comparing me with their children who look better than me and are well built. They never congratulate me when I inform them about my promotion or when I received my degree. They more talk about my looks and weight issues rather in a mocking way. My aunt too tries many a times to demean me before others making me feel embarrassed as for her only looks matters. Very rarely do I find strangers talking about my looks.


d. 72% of women agree that working women face more judgments on their looks or their clothes than housewives.

I being a working women have faced this personally in my office. Except my boss, there are girls and boys who keep teasing me always and judge my talent based on my looks and weight. They tell me that I won't be able to work overtime as I am thin but for me, I can work till anytime as I am determined to do so and for me my work is worship.


I’m breaking stereotypes based on appearance by sharing my experience for the #IAmCapable activity at BlogAdda in association with Nihar Naturals.




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